An Open Letter to Singers
Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009Dear Singer/Vocalist/”Artiste”:
The Christmas Season is once again upon us, and soon you will be put into situations where you will want to join with others and sing the songs of the season. This may mean that you will sing a solo piece at church, or if you are fortunate enough to make a living making music, you may be entertaining large crowds. Everyone, myself included, loves the traditional carols which have flourished for decades, and hearing them always brings a little happiness and cheer.
However, some of you out there are ruining the joy that Christmas music brings. You are literally strangling all of the joy and happiness out of the music before our very ears. How? With the warble.
First made famous by Whitney Houston when she sang the National Anthem at the Super Bowl awhile back, warbling is when the singer holds a note for much longer than was intended, and then tries to sound like a jazz saxaphone player by singing free-form melody over the background music. The problem is, 99 times out of a hundred, this sounds like someone stomping on a cat’s tail. Its just that irritating.
Now, don’t get your little feelings hurt. I know you are just trying to “make the song your own.” What you need to remember is this: The audience doesn’t want you to make the song your own. They don’t want to listen to you warble on and on. They just want to hear the damn song the way it was written.
You see, the reason why the audience wants you to stick to the music is because of what the music represents. It isn’t about you, or your multi-octave voice, or your musical identity. This music is about time spent with family on Christmases past, about your family’s holiday traditions and memories. Yes, we love the music, but mostly we love the memories the music evokes in us.
Your warbling drives a stake right through the center of those memories and kills them dead. It drives us insane. Really, it does (just ask my wife).
So, this year leave the warbling to the birds and just sing the song like it was written. It will be appreciated more than you know.
Thanks.
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December 7th, 2009 at 11:29 am
Umm… drives a steak through? I’ll take mine medium rare, thanks.
December 7th, 2009 at 10:22 pm
Good rant!
I can picture Rene screaming at the television during such an event.
Ah… To enjoy that again.