Nations Rush To Aid Katrina Victims
Wednesday, August 31st, 2005NEW ORLEANS – The French vessel Cheesy Snails is headed, at full speed, to the Gulf of Mexico and should arrive at the hurricane devastated coastal regions of Louisiana, Alabama, and Mississippi by Friday, said French President Jacques Chirac. “Every time some natural disaster happens, the United States is always first on the scene with food, supplies, and money to aid the victims. It is only fitting that in it’s hour of need, America receive all the help it can from those of us who have benefited from their generosity in the past,” Chirac said in a prepared statement.
Also on the way, via truck, are several doctors and other medical professionals from Mexico, who will help local doctors with medical supplies and expertise. “Hell, Mexicans have been benefiting from free American health care for decades. This is the least we could do,” said Doctor Jose Canyousee.
Canada had planned on sending doctors and nurses to the disaster areas, however they were unable to schedule an appointment until sometime in early 2008. Presumably, there will be no need for their help at that time. “Hey, it’s free,” said the Canadian Surgeon General, “What else do you want?”
Several other European nations are lining up to send aid to the victims of Katrina. Germany has promised to send engineering specialists to help rebuild New Orleans, with the condition that U.S. Forces leave Iraq immediately and return Sadaam Hussien to power.
This piece of satire was written by Nick at Conservative Dialysis. You are free to use it as long as credit is given to the author.
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August 31st, 2005 at 10:52 am
The French vessel should more appropriately be named “Yellow Cheesy Snails”
September 1st, 2005 at 4:19 am
American Red Cross
Today’s dose of NIF – News, Interesting & Funny … It’s Stop the ACLU Thursday, and Katrina Relief Day!